Saturday, December 31, 2011

比喻

又一年过去了
分享下我觉得挺有意思的比喻

1. 蜘蛛:能坐享其成,靠的就是那張關係網。
2. 蝦:大紅之日,便是大悲之時。
3. 天平:誰多給一點,就偏向誰。
4. 瀑布:因居高臨下,才口若懸河。
5. 鋸子:伶牙俐齒,專做離間行為。
6. 氣球:只要被人一吹,便飄飄然了。
7. 鐘錶:可以回到起點,卻已不是昨天。
8. 核桃:沒有華麗的外表,卻有充實的大腦。
9. 指南針:思想穩定,東西再好也不被誘惑。
10. 花瓶:外表再漂亮,也掩不住內心的空虛。
11. 樹葉:得勢時趾高氣揚,失意時威風掃地。
12. 歷史的標點全是問號,歷史的幕後全是驚嘆號!
13. 年輕人以為教育可以取代經驗,年長者以為經驗可以取代教育。
14. 飯桌上批孩子,大人傷神,孩子傷胃,全家傷心。
15. 父母想念子女就像流水一樣,一直在流;
      而子女想念父母就像風吹樹葉,風吹一下,就動 一下,風不吹,就不動。
16. 夫妻倆過日子要像一雙筷子:
      一是誰也離不開誰; 二是什麼酸甜苦辣都能一起嘗。
17. 揮不去的是記憶,
      留不住的是年華,
      拎不起的是失落,
      放不下的是情感,
      輸不起的是尊嚴。
18. 因為電話,信箋少了;
      因為時尚,布料少了;
      因為空調,汗水少了;
      因為應酬,親情少了;
      因為宴會,食欲少了;
      因為競爭,悠閒少了......

taken from here
Sunday, December 25, 2011
Merry Christmas!!
Friday, December 16, 2011

2011 in Review

Thursday, December 15, 2011

干! In this FIRST WORLD country, chances of getting a faulty MRT is higher than hitting a Jackpot

First there's the taxi fare hike. Comfort taking the lead, then SMRT follow suit.
NOW,  a breakdown on North-South Line during evening peak hour (more at XINMSN and STOMP).
Never have I been so pissed at SMRT.


Ms Saw, GIVE ME BACK MY MONEY!!!

Thursday, December 1, 2011

Counting down

Wednesday, November 30, 2011

5 lessons to learn

Enjoy and Learn


A junior manager, a senior manager and their boss are on their way to a meeting.
On their way through a park, they come across a wonder lamp. They rub the lamp and a ghost appears.
The ghost says, "Normally, one is granted three wishes but as you are three, I will allow one wish each"
So the eager senior manager shouted, "I want the first wish. I want to be in the Bahamas , on a fast boat and have no worries." Pfufffff, and he was gone.
Now the junior manager could not keep quiet and shouted "I want to be in Florida with beautiful girls, plenty of food and cocktails." Pfufffff, and he was also gone.
The boss calmly said, "I want these two idiots back in the office after lunch at 12.35pm."

Lesson I - Always allow the bosses to speak first.

**************************************************************************************
Standing in front of a shredder with a piece of paper in his hand.
"Listen," said the CEO, "this is a very sensitive and important document, and my secretary has left. Can you make this thing work?"
"Certainly," said the young executive. He turned the machine on, inserted the paper, and pressed the start button.
"Excellent, excellent!" said the CEO as his paper disappeared inside the shredder machine.
"I just need one copy."

Lesson II - Never, never assume that your BOSS knows everything.

************************************************************************************************
An American and a Japanese were sitting on the plane on the way to LA when the American turned to the Japanese and asked, "What kind of -ese are you?"
The Japanese confused, replied, "Sorry but I don't understand what you mean."
The American repeated, "What kind of -ese are you?" Again, the Japanese was confused over he question.
The American, now irritated, then yelled, "What kind of -ese are you... Are you a Chinese, Japanese, Vietnamese!, etc......???"
The Japanese then replied, "Oh, I am a Japanese."

A while later the Japanese turned to the American and asked What kind of 'key' was he.
The American, frustrated, yelled, "What do you mean what kind of -kee' am I ?!"
The Japanese said, "Are you a Yankee, donkee, or monkee?"

Lesson III - Never insult anyone.

**************************************************************************************************
There were these 4 guys, a Russian, a German, an American and a French, who found this small genie bottle. When they rubbed the bottle, a genie appeared.
Thankful that the 4 guys had released him out of the bottle, He said, "Next to you all are 4 swimming pools, I will give each of you a wish. When you run towards the pool and jump, you shout what you want the pool of water to become, then your wish will come true."

The French wanted to start. He ran towards the pool, jumped and shouted"WINE".
The pool immediately changed into a pool of wine. The Frenchman was so happy swimming and drinking from the pool.
Next is the Russian's turn, he did the same and shouted, "VODKA" and immersed himself into a pool of vodka.
The German was next and he jumped and shouted, "BEER". He was so contented with his beer pool.
The last is the American. He was running towards the pool when suddenly he steps on a banana peel. He slipped towards the pool and shouted, "SHIT!!!!!!!........."

Lesson IV - Think twice before you say something, because sometimes accidents do happen.

******************************************************************************************************
The organs of the body were having a meeting, trying to decide who was in charge.
Each organ took a turn to speak up:
Brain......... I should be in charge because I run all body functions.
Blood........ I should be in charge because I circulate oxygen for the brain.
Stomach... I should be in charge because I process food to the brain.
Legs......... I should be in charge because I take the brain where it wants to go.
Eyes......... I should be in charge because I let the brain see where it's going.
Asshole.....I should be in charge because I get rid of your waste.

All the other parts laughed so hard and this made the asshole very mad. To prove his point, the asshole immediately slammed tightly closed and stayed that way for 6 days, refusing to rid the body of any waste whatsoever.

Day 1 - Brain got a terrible headache and cried out for relief
Day 2 - Stomach got bloated and began to ache terribly
Day 3 - Legs got cramps and became unstable
Day 4 - Eyes became watery and vision became blurred
Day 5 - Blood became toxic and poisoned the body
Day 6 -The other organs agreed to let the asshole be in charge.

Lesson VI - No matter who you are, or how important you think you are, you will find that it is always the ASSHOLE that is in charge.
Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Christmas Mood...

Friday, November 11, 2011

本世纪最大的节日,可惜我错过了

祝光棍节快乐
Monday, November 7, 2011

7 Billion and Still Counting

Current World Population
from Nat Geo

from Nat Geo

from Boston.com

I Wanna Move to the Out Skerries!!
Monday, October 31, 2011

3-Minute Management Course

Lesson One:

An eagle was sitting on a tree resting, doing nothing.

A small rabbit saw the eagle and asked him, "Can I also sit like you and do nothing?"

The eagle answered: "Sure, why not." So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the eagle and rested.

All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it.

Management Lesson:
To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up.
___________________________________________________________

Lesson Two:

A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree," sighed the turkey. "But I haven't got the energy."

"Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?" replied the bull. "They're packed with nutrients."

The turkey pecked at a lump of dung, and found it actually gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch.

Finally after a fourth night, the turkey was proudly perched at the top of the tree. He was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot him out of the tree.

Management Lesson:
Bull shit might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there.
___________________________________________________________

Lesson Three:

A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold the bird froze and fell to the ground into a large field.

While he was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on him.

As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, he began to realize how warm he was. The dung was actually thawing him out! He laid there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy.

A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate.
Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him.

Management Lesson:
(1) Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy.
(2) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend.
(3) And when you're in deep shit, it's best to keep your mouth shut!

This ends the three minute management course.
Saturday, October 15, 2011

Ingenious Batman Equation

Saw this on Facebook, and I thought it's fake.

But out of curiosity, I went to google 'Batman equation", and found that somebody actually solve it!!
These people are brilliant...
And the prof who came out with this equation is genius.


Solution taken from HERE:




The ellipse (x7)2+(y3)21=0 looks like this:
ellipse
So the curve (x7)2x3x3+(y3)2y+3337y+33371=0 is the above ellipse, in the region where |x|>3 and y>333/7:
ellipse cut
That's the first factor.

The second factor is quite ingeniously done. The curve x2(3337)112x23+1(||x|2|1)2y=0 looks like:
second factor
This is got by adding y=x2(3337)112x23, a parabola on the positive-x side, reflected:
second factor first term
and y=1(||x|2|1)2, the upper halves of the four circles (||x|2|1)2+y2=1:
second factor second term

The third factor 9((1x)(x.75))(1x)(x.75)8|x|y=0 is just the pair of lines y = 9 - 8|x|:
Third factor without cut
truncated to the region 0.75<|x|<1.

Similarly, the fourth factor 3|x|+.75((.75x)(x.5)(.75x)(x.5))y=0 is the pair of lines y=3|x|+0.75:
fourth factor without cut
truncated to the region 0.5<|x|<0.75.

The fifth factor 2.25(.5x)(x+.5)(.5x)(x+.5)y=0 is the line y=2.25 truncated to 0.5<x<0.5.

Finally, 6107+(1.5.5|x|)(610)144(|x|1)2y=0 looks like:
sixth factor without cut
so the sixth factor 6107+(1.5.5|x|)x1x1(610)144(|x|1)2y=0 looks like
sixth factor

As a product of factors is 0 iff any one of them is 0, multiplying these six factors puts the curves together, giving: (the software, Grapher.app, chokes a bit on the third factor, and entirely on the fourth)
Wholly Batman